Yes, the show is going on (another) vacation until Tuesday Feb. 16th. We’re going to be leaving you with Classic Senseless Surveys every day, though; right at 7:15am. So we’re not leaving you without your fix, you junkies! Adios, we’ll be back next Tuesday!

I know the feeling, Jack.
(nice hat, background dude)

This guy is Charlie Booker, and he just proved why the internet is better than TV. Some naughty language within, but trust me, it’s more than worth it.  

So we’ve been sitting in a lot of boring ass meetings lately, discussing future promotions, ideas for the show, and of course, thing we’ve done wrong; and Heather and I have been trying to find ways to pass the time. For no good reason, we decided to start taking pics of Heather’s socks and posting them on Karlson & McKenzie’s Twitter. They then, through Internet magic, instantenously show up on Facebook, too. Well, a lot of people are into it, judging by the email and comments we’ve read. So for those of you who’ve never seen them, here are a few pics of Heather’s socks. Check out our facebook page or the Twitter account to get up-to-the-minute updates on this fascinating subject. Or don’t. Who am I, your mother?

1. They knocked off Favre.

2. Peyton’s not on their team.

3. Katrina. The Saints are a big part of what is bringing New Orleans back from the edge of being a postapocalyptic nightmare of a city, kinda like Detroit. That city lives and breathes the Saints, and the organization & the team havce doe a lot to restore faith and pride back into it. Their fans deserve something good.

4. Drew Brees. Seems like a really nice, genuine guy. The fact that the hated Chargers kicked him to the curb becuase they were so sure Philip Rivers was a better option makes it even more fun to root for one of the most underrated players in the game. (Also, it seems like he was a fan of the Fresh Prince):

5. Did I mention they’re the reason Favre isn’t in the playoffs anymore? 

6. Kim Kardashian. Reggie Bush’s girlfriend. Dat ASS. 

7. Archie Manning can suck it. If they win, Archie Manning (who’s their best player they’ve had in their franchise’s history AND an unsufferable prick) can’t celebrate the win, because that means his fancyboy sone Pey-Pey lost the big one.

8. This video.
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cMSu4dOIsbg]
Holy crap, this is from 1983? What kind of lawless Wild West league were we watching back then? You’ve got coaches wearing cowboy hats on the sideline, shirtless drunken fans standing on seats, and the worst facial hair I’ve ever encouintered other than your mom’s. Check out the taunting after a Saints player makes a sack! That throatslash! is epic! (Remember when you could do that without being forced into sensitivity training during your season-long suspension?) By the way, the coach in the video is Bum Phillips, Wade Phillips’ pop. 

9. The “Who Dat?” chant. I still don’t know what it means, but it’s awesome.

10. They’re no longer the ’Aints. This was the worst franchise for the longest stretch that I can remember. They were perennial doormats for over two decades. This is their first Super Bowl, and they’re underdogs against a team anyone outside that whirling suckshow of a town called Indianapolis is sick of seeing. They have the opportunity to unleash the Manning Face from it’s season-long slumber. The Colts used to be the doormats, so did the Bucs, the Pats, and the Cardinals. But they’ve all had their moments in the sun. Ain’t it about time for the Saints? 

Big Head Braden and the ZLX Rock n’ Roll Patrol will be making the trip up to Salem NH tonight (Wednesday, Jan 27th 2010) to hang with Coors Light at Margarita’s Mexican Restaurant off of 93 N (Exit 2 in NH)! Stop on by, we’ll be giving away a ton of Ski Passes and a 4-Pack of tickets to see the best lacrosse team in town, the Boston Blazers live at the Boston Garden! So come slug down some silver bullets with Big Head tonight!

So we came back on Monday morning (all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed) ready to make our daily radio magic happen yet again, only to find the cabinet that we store our headphones in had been broken into over the weekend. I know! THE UNMITIGATED GALL!!!

We, of course, felt violated and just a little dirty, but this is an age-old problem in the radio business. Every station has an issue with headphones. Jocks who work on the weekend don’t make a lot of scratch, and figure that instead of buying their own damn headphones, they can just borrow someone else’s and the owner will understand. The problem with this is that the weekend jocks are mostly either unclean and/or clumsy, and they end up ruining or stealing your headphones. That’s why we lock them up. We’re not trying to be jerks, but it can come off that way. (I used to work on the weekends, I can see where the part-timers are coming from.)

Apparently, one of the jocks REALLY needed extra headphones this weekend (there was a band in studio on Sunday during the local rock show, our suspicions lay there), and took a screwdriver or a crowbar to the cabinet and broke the whole damn thing, so it won’t even close anymore.

Again: THE UNMITIGATED GALL!!!

Thus, we have a dilemma: Where do we keep our headphones? We have to leave them in the building; we’re boned if we leave them at home. We wouldn’t be able to do the show. We know they could “walk off” or magically stop working if they aren’t protected. There are lockers in the basement, but that’s two full flights of stairs to climb twice a day. Kevin and Pete ain’t doing THAT. So how do we respond to this egregious illegal act of villany? By committing our own equally egregious illegal act of villany!

Meet the new K&M cabinet! We stole it from the Sports Hub offices this morning! We’re like thieves in the night!

Well, alright then. I’ve been doing this bit on WZLX for over 4 years now, and I’ve got plenty of them, but considering I’ve been seeing more ripoffs of it, I thought I might as well stake my claim.

Listen to it here: WZLX Karlson & McKenzie’s Podcast Page. Originally aired JANUARY 25th, 2010 on 100.7 WZLX Boston’s Classic Rock : The “Karlson & McKenzie” Morning Show. There are many more here.  

That Guy – Who’s just so proud of himself for going green

Well hey there, Favre-lovers. So I was out and about at Home Depot this weekend, looking for some kind of wonder cleaner that can take bleach stains on your girlfriends Ugg boots, or a brown marker, you know don’t matter I’m still screwed anyway, but while I’m standing there in line at the customer service desk, I find myself behind a guy who obviously left the house wearing his complainey paints.

He was bitching to the pimple faced part timer behind the counter about how he couldn’t find a proper pet friendly and chemical free ice melt, and was taking this teenager in the orange smock to task because as this guy was privy to shouting for everyone to hear: he was trying to save the planet not only for the clerk, but the clerk’s kids.

It was about that time that I noticed the Prius keychain, the land’s end faux-leather clogs made from 100% recycled material, and the subtle scent of patchouli and smugness wafting from this earth warrior’s unwashed hair. Oh dude, do you really have to be that guy? That guy who’s way too proud of himself for going Green.

Going Green. No Kevin, it doesn’t mean ordering Pistachio instead of your usual 14 scoops of rocky road. Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you know it means making an effort to be more environmentally responsible and we’ve been beaten over the head with it for a few years now. Whether it be your neighbors separating their brown and green glass, or your town passing out more of those blue bins, or Leno stealing other people’s bits, jokes, and jobs, making them unfunny, and using them again, Recycling and other green actions are hotter than Kevin’s jiggly bits would be in corduroy boxers.

But whether or not you drive a hybrid or build a giant windmill in your backyard, it doesn’t give you the right to be a pompous douchenozzle about it. Great, you might take the bus, or reuse your toilet paper, but what you’re not conserving on is the hot air spilling out your pie hole while singing your own praises. Relax, pal. Yes you’re doing a good thing by looking out for planet earth, and I’ll gladly pass up punching you in the face if I’ve got a free shot at one of those morons who didn’t vote last Tuesday because their saving their votes for American Idol, but don’t push it.

I’m no hippie peace freak, hell, I’m the guy who bawled like a baby during Conan’s last show and not during the Haiti telethon, but you’re so bloated with self satisfaction and begging for a swift knee to the jubblies, I almost confused you with Luke Wilson during one of those god awful AT&T Commercials. You’re softer than Pete’s dad watching a Kathy Bates nude scene.

If I have to hear about your compost pile or your rain forest friendly preservative free coffee for another second, I swear I’ll go dropkick a dolphin. Dude, I want to save the environment too, but while I’d prefer not to step on a used syringe or a puddle of Karlson-grade neck grease oil while walking on the beach, I’d swan dive into a pile of both if it meant not having to listen to you prattle on about what a preservationist you are.

You’re milking this more than Favre played up his supposed injury during the 4^th quarter last night.  So stop trying to tell me about how you’re minimizing your carbon footprint unless you want me to put a purple one on your ass, clownshoes. Otherwise, I’ll hop on one of those Japanese whaling boats, help myself to a harpoon, hunt you down, and cram it up your cram hole. Do me a favor, don’t be that guy.              

Meet Ryan Lehman.

Me and Ryan went to high school together. He’s now a cop in Manchester NH. He’s the nicest guy you’ll ever meet, and he asked me to throw this here. He’s doing the Penguin Plunge (where a bunch of morons dive into an ice cold  or pool) to raise money for the Special Olympics up in New Hampshire, and he’s looking for some help fundraising. Here’s the link to his fundraising page. Please help him out if you can, it’s a good cause. Plus, this looks like fun…

With that said…

Look, he’s an old friend and I owe him, so don’t start coming out of the woodwork asking me to sponsor your 5K to raise awareness of the plight facing transexual neo-nazi eskimos, or whatever you got to push. This here’s a one time thing. But if his numbers get bumped up by this, maybe I’ll reconsider. Help Ryan out! Donate today!

I love me some Eric Clapton, and I know a ton of you do, too. I used to listen to a different CD from the “24 Nights” live box sets on the way to high school all 5 years I attended. (Best version of “Wonderful Tonight” ever!!!) Anyhoo, the man can do no wrong in my book, but some people are freaking out about this T-Mobile commercial he did for the new limited edition Fender “My Touch” cellphone. What do you think? Did Slow Hand cross a line?